Ok so you read some of the positive reviews and thought " huh, seems cool. I wonder if theres anything wrong/bad about the game?" So you click no the negative reviews to find out. Let me tell you something. theres nothing wrong with the game but there is with you. Do you know how I know that. I do. It's becase you clicked on negative reviews instead of Add to cart. you see the problem here? SO WHY ARE YOU STILL READING THIS REVIEW?? BUY THE FU**ING GAME ALREADY!!!! (Get the GOTY copy)
*Playing Co-Op with a friend*
*You see a weapon with good stats*
*Friend takes it*
*1 hour long argument starts*
10/10 would find others to play co-op with
A psycho came running to me screaming:
"I like my victims like i like my coffee...
IN THE BUTT"
Literally the most wtf quote i've heard in a video game.
Legends say that even the developers found the objective of the mission Shoot This Guy In The Face so cryptic and difficult, they needed to browse the coding.... TWICE. I mean, it IS a really hard mission which barely tells you what to do. The quest only says:
Shoot McShooty in the face
...but not in the arm
...but not in the leg
...but not in the chest
Face Mcshooty also screams something about shooting him in the face but even today, professional Borderlands players are STILL trying to figure out what he means by that. The ONLY way to beat this mission is to cheat by messing with the game's code. Otherwise this mission is way too cryptic and impossible to beat.
Also great game tho
SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! IN THE FAAAAAAAACE! DO IT! SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! FACE FACEFACEFACEFACE! NOW! BULLETS IN THE FACE! WANT EM! NEED EM! GIMMEGIMMEGIMME! AT THE SOUND OF THE BELL IT WILL BE FACESHOOTING O'CLOCK! BONGGGGG! KNOCK KNOCK WHO'S THERE SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! END OF JOKE! I'M GONNA SING A SONG! SHOOT ME AT THE END OF IT! DA DA DA DA DA DA DA! BONG!! ...I NOTICE YOU HAVEN'T SHOT ME IN THE FACE! CURIOUS AS TO WHY! Maybe you're weighing the moral pros and cons but let me assure you that OH MY GOD SHOOT ME IN THE GODDAMNED FACE!! WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!?!
IN THE FACE! NOT SO COMPLEX! NEED IT! WANT IT NEED IT HAVE TO HAVE IT! FACESHOT! BOOM! BRAINS EVERYWHERE! Not the KNEE, not the ARM, not the SPINE - FACE! IT HAS TO HAPPEN! HNNNNG! FACEY FACEY FACE FACE! TIRED OF WAITING! NO MORE WAITING! NEED A FACE SHOT! BOOM! SQUISH! YAY!
DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT A FACE IS!?
THANK YOU!
"See, this is what I don't get about you bad guys. You know the hero's gonna win, but you never just die quickly-- man, this one guy in New Haven, right? City's burning, people dying, blah blah blah. This guy rushes me with a spoon. A fricking spoon. And I'm just laughing. So I scoop out his eyeballs with it, and his kids are all, 'waahh!,' and, ah...you had to be there. Anyway, the moral is: you're a bitch."
Handsome Jack is seriously the best villain and is just one of the reasons to buy this glorious masterpiece of a game.
69/10
Buy game.
Install game.
Play game.
Find gun.
Shoot enemies.
Get better gun.
Shoot bigger enemies.
Get even better gun.
Kill a boss.
Get a super gun.
Beat the game.
Party.
Attempt to defeat a raid boss.
Fail.
Find random public game.
Attempt to defeat a raid boss again.
Fail.
Leave public game.
Host a game.
Invite friends.
Fail.
Buy them the game.
Invite friends.
Train them.
Give them better guns.
Attempt to beat a raid boss yet again.
Fail.
Once more.
Fail.
Ignore raid boss.
Increase difficulty.
Troll friends.
Beat game again.
Party again.
Get super duper gun.
Attempt to beat a raid boss.
Success.
Loot underleveled.
Sell them.
Increase difficulty.
Get destroyed.
Get obliterated.
Get demolished.
Leave game.
Come back after a week.
Try again.
Get dunked on.
Find SHIFT codes.
Use SHIFT codes.
Use 50 golden keys.
Get a slag weapon.
Try again.
Get revenge.
Speedrun.
Beat the game again.
Don't party.
Buy DLC.
Buy friends DLC.
Host a game.
Invite friends.
Fail.
Get bored.
Wait for friends.
Fail.
Wait a week.
Invite friends.
Fail.
Wait more.
Fail.
Exit game.
Fail.
Power off computer.
Fail.
Open task manager.
Fail.
Virus scan.
Fail.
Unplug power.
Fail.
Leave house.
Fail.
Cry.
Fail.
Host a game.
Invite friends.
Success.
Enjoy game.
Fail.
Friends leave.
Explode.
Success.
Take-Two and 2K games have updated all their games Terms of Service, turning this game as well as all of their other games into literal spyware.
Important Info in Terms of Service:
• Mods are a bannable offense
• Display of Cheats/Exploits is bannable
• Forced arbitration clause and a waiver of class action and jury trial rights for all users residing in the United States and any other territory other than Australia, Switzerland, The United Kingdom, or The Territories of The European Economic Area
• You can be banned for using a VPN while connecting to online servers
• Cannot access game content on a Virtual PC
Collected Data Types:
• Identifiers / Contact Information: Name, user name, gamertag, postal and email address, phone number, unique IDs, mobile device ID, platform ID, gaming service ID, advertising ID (IDFA, Android ID) and IP address
• Protected Characteristics: Age and gender
• Commercial Information: Purchase and usage history and preferences, including gameplay information
• Billing Information: Payment information (credit / debit card information) and shipping address
• Internet / Electronic Activity: Web / app browsing and gameplay information related to the Services; information about your online interaction(s) with the Services or our advertising; and details about the games and platforms you use and other information related to installed applications
• Device and Usage Data: Device type, software and hardware details, language settings, browser type and version, operating system, and information about how users use and interact with the Services (e.g., content viewed, pages visited, clicks, scrolls)
• Profile Inferences: Inferences made from your information and web activity to help create a personalized profile so we can identify goods and services that may be of interest
• Audio / Visual Information: Account photos, images, and avatars, audio information via chat features and functionality, and gameplay recordings and video footage (such as when you participate in playtesting)
• Sensitive Information: Precise location information (if you allow the Services to collect your location), account credentials (user name and password), and contents of communications via chat features and functionality.
Fatass daughter of sexy character.
13-year old demolitionist.
A robot calling you his minion and throwing birthday party.
Gang wars.
Diablo-style weapon generation.
Jokes, jokes everywhere.
"Not a bit of insanity".
Really good and funny DLCs worth the cost. (If you bought GOTY at least)
And I'm not even halfway through the game.
11/10 three-barrelled sniper rifles with mounted blade carried by psycho midgets.
After some extensive testing, I have come to the conclusion that Borderlands 2 is a very good game. It can keep you amused for, um, quite a while.
My all time favourite game. Enough said.
I had played 1200 hours before I even tried any of the DLC. Now, if that doesn't speak to the incredible level of fun and depth that this game brings, well, I just don't know that anything can.
Sometimes I wonder how much better my life would be if I had spent those 1400 hours doing something constructive like studying my trade, helping the poor, or working on my home. But not often.
Second best game ever made. Absolutely terrific. Life ruiner. Go for it.
Nice gunplay? Check.
Hilarious characters? Check.
Massive replayablility? Check.
Open world with many secrets to explore? Check.
Loots? Check.
Guns?
Alot of them.
EDIT: I realized that my biggest mistake of my life was NOT to buy GOTY edition.
PLEASE DONT MAKE MY MISTAKE AND JUST BUY THE FUCKING GOTY EDITION
---{Graphics}---
☐ You forget what reality is
☐ Beautiful
☐ Good
X Decent
☐ Bad
☐ Don‘t look too long at it
☐ Paint.exe
---{Gameplay}---
X Very good
☐ Good
☐ It‘s just gameplay
☐ Mehh
☐ Starring at walls is better
☐ Just don‘t
---{Audio}---
☐ Eargasm
☐ Very good
x Good
☐ Not too bad
☐ Bad
☐ Earrape
---{Audience}---
☐ Kids
☐ Teens
x Adults
☐ Human
☐ Lizards
---{PC Requirements}---
☐ Check if you can run paint
☐ Potato
X Decent
☐ Fast
☐ Rich boiiiiii
☐ Ask NASA if they have a spare computer
---{Difficulity}---
☐ Just press ‚A‘
☐ Easy
X Significant brain usage
☐ Easy to learn / Hard to master
☐ Difficult
☐ Dark Souls
---{Grind}---
☐ Nothing to grind
☐ Only if u care about leaderboards/ranks
☐ Isnt necessary to progress
☐ Average grind level
X Too much grind
☐ You‘ll need a second live for grinding
---{Story}---
☐ Story?
☐ Text or Audio floating around
☐ Average
X Good
☐ Lovely
☐ It‘ll replace your life
---{Game Time}---
☐ Long enough for a cup of coffee
☐ Short
☐ Average
☐ Long
X To infinity and beyond
---{Price}---
☐ It’s free!
☑ Worth the price
☐ If u have some spare money left
☐ Not recommended
☐ You could also just burn your money
---{Bugs}---
☐ Never heard of
X Minor bugs
☐ Can get annoying
☐ ARK: Survival Evolved
☐ The game itself is a big terrarium for bugs
Ok so you read some of the positive reviews and thought " huh, seems cool. I wonder if theres anything wrong/bad about the game?" So you click no the negative reviews to find out. Let me tell you something. theres nothing wrong with the game but there is with you. Do you know how I know that. I do. It's becase you clicked on negative reviews instead of Add to cart. you see the problem here? SO WHY ARE YOU STILL READING THIS REVIEW?? BUY THE FU**ING GAME ALREADY!!!! (Get the GOTY copy)
*Playing Co-Op with a friend*
*You see a weapon with good stats*
*Friend takes it*
*1 hour long argument starts*
10/10 would find others to play co-op with
A psycho came running to me screaming:
"I like my victims like i like my coffee...
IN THE BUTT"
Literally the most wtf quote i've heard in a video game.
Legends say that even the developers found the objective of the mission Shoot This Guy In The Face so cryptic and difficult, they needed to browse the coding.... TWICE. I mean, it IS a really hard mission which barely tells you what to do. The quest only says:
Shoot McShooty in the face
...but not in the arm
...but not in the leg
...but not in the chest
Face Mcshooty also screams something about shooting him in the face but even today, professional Borderlands players are STILL trying to figure out what he means by that. The ONLY way to beat this mission is to cheat by messing with the game's code. Otherwise this mission is way too cryptic and impossible to beat.
Also great game tho
SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! IN THE FAAAAAAAACE! DO IT! SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! FACE FACEFACEFACEFACE! NOW! BULLETS IN THE FACE! WANT EM! NEED EM! GIMMEGIMMEGIMME! AT THE SOUND OF THE BELL IT WILL BE FACESHOOTING O'CLOCK! BONGGGGG! KNOCK KNOCK WHO'S THERE SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! END OF JOKE! I'M GONNA SING A SONG! SHOOT ME AT THE END OF IT! DA DA DA DA DA DA DA! BONG!! ...I NOTICE YOU HAVEN'T SHOT ME IN THE FACE! CURIOUS AS TO WHY! Maybe you're weighing the moral pros and cons but let me assure you that OH MY GOD SHOOT ME IN THE GODDAMNED FACE!! WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!?!
IN THE FACE! NOT SO COMPLEX! NEED IT! WANT IT NEED IT HAVE TO HAVE IT! FACESHOT! BOOM! BRAINS EVERYWHERE! Not the KNEE, not the ARM, not the SPINE - FACE! IT HAS TO HAPPEN! HNNNNG! FACEY FACEY FACE FACE! TIRED OF WAITING! NO MORE WAITING! NEED A FACE SHOT! BOOM! SQUISH! YAY!
DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT A FACE IS!?
THANK YOU!
"See, this is what I don't get about you bad guys. You know the hero's gonna win, but you never just die quickly-- man, this one guy in New Haven, right? City's burning, people dying, blah blah blah. This guy rushes me with a spoon. A fricking spoon. And I'm just laughing. So I scoop out his eyeballs with it, and his kids are all, 'waahh!,' and, ah...you had to be there. Anyway, the moral is: you're a bitch."
Handsome Jack is seriously the best villain and is just one of the reasons to buy this glorious masterpiece of a game.
69/10
Buy game.
Install game.
Play game.
Find gun.
Shoot enemies.
Get better gun.
Shoot bigger enemies.
Get even better gun.
Kill a boss.
Get a super gun.
Beat the game.
Party.
Attempt to defeat a raid boss.
Fail.
Find random public game.
Attempt to defeat a raid boss again.
Fail.
Leave public game.
Host a game.
Invite friends.
Fail.
Buy them the game.
Invite friends.
Train them.
Give them better guns.
Attempt to beat a raid boss yet again.
Fail.
Once more.
Fail.
Ignore raid boss.
Increase difficulty.
Troll friends.
Beat game again.
Party again.
Get super duper gun.
Attempt to beat a raid boss.
Success.
Loot underleveled.
Sell them.
Increase difficulty.
Get destroyed.
Get obliterated.
Get demolished.
Leave game.
Come back after a week.
Try again.
Get dunked on.
Find SHIFT codes.
Use SHIFT codes.
Use 50 golden keys.
Get a slag weapon.
Try again.
Get revenge.
Speedrun.
Beat the game again.
Don't party.
Buy DLC.
Buy friends DLC.
Host a game.
Invite friends.
Fail.
Get bored.
Wait for friends.
Fail.
Wait a week.
Invite friends.
Fail.
Wait more.
Fail.
Exit game.
Fail.
Power off computer.
Fail.
Open task manager.
Fail.
Virus scan.
Fail.
Unplug power.
Fail.
Leave house.
Fail.
Cry.
Fail.
Host a game.
Invite friends.
Success.
Enjoy game.
Fail.
Friends leave.
Explode.
Success.
Take-Two and 2K games have updated all their games Terms of Service, turning this game as well as all of their other games into literal spyware.
Important Info in Terms of Service:
• Mods are a bannable offense
• Display of Cheats/Exploits is bannable
• Forced arbitration clause and a waiver of class action and jury trial rights for all users residing in the United States and any other territory other than Australia, Switzerland, The United Kingdom, or The Territories of The European Economic Area
• You can be banned for using a VPN while connecting to online servers
• Cannot access game content on a Virtual PC
Collected Data Types:
• Identifiers / Contact Information: Name, user name, gamertag, postal and email address, phone number, unique IDs, mobile device ID, platform ID, gaming service ID, advertising ID (IDFA, Android ID) and IP address
• Protected Characteristics: Age and gender
• Commercial Information: Purchase and usage history and preferences, including gameplay information
• Billing Information: Payment information (credit / debit card information) and shipping address
• Internet / Electronic Activity: Web / app browsing and gameplay information related to the Services; information about your online interaction(s) with the Services or our advertising; and details about the games and platforms you use and other information related to installed applications
• Device and Usage Data: Device type, software and hardware details, language settings, browser type and version, operating system, and information about how users use and interact with the Services (e.g., content viewed, pages visited, clicks, scrolls)
• Profile Inferences: Inferences made from your information and web activity to help create a personalized profile so we can identify goods and services that may be of interest
• Audio / Visual Information: Account photos, images, and avatars, audio information via chat features and functionality, and gameplay recordings and video footage (such as when you participate in playtesting)
• Sensitive Information: Precise location information (if you allow the Services to collect your location), account credentials (user name and password), and contents of communications via chat features and functionality.
Fatass daughter of sexy character.
13-year old demolitionist.
A robot calling you his minion and throwing birthday party.
Gang wars.
Diablo-style weapon generation.
Jokes, jokes everywhere.
"Not a bit of insanity".
Really good and funny DLCs worth the cost. (If you bought GOTY at least)
And I'm not even halfway through the game.
11/10 three-barrelled sniper rifles with mounted blade carried by psycho midgets.
After some extensive testing, I have come to the conclusion that Borderlands 2 is a very good game. It can keep you amused for, um, quite a while.
My all time favourite game. Enough said.
I had played 1200 hours before I even tried any of the DLC. Now, if that doesn't speak to the incredible level of fun and depth that this game brings, well, I just don't know that anything can.
Sometimes I wonder how much better my life would be if I had spent those 1400 hours doing something constructive like studying my trade, helping the poor, or working on my home. But not often.
Second best game ever made. Absolutely terrific. Life ruiner. Go for it.
Nice gunplay? Check.
Hilarious characters? Check.
Massive replayablility? Check.
Open world with many secrets to explore? Check.
Loots? Check.
Guns?
Alot of them.
EDIT: I realized that my biggest mistake of my life was NOT to buy GOTY edition.
PLEASE DONT MAKE MY MISTAKE AND JUST BUY THE FUCKING GOTY EDITION
---{Graphics}---
☐ You forget what reality is
☐ Beautiful
☐ Good
X Decent
☐ Bad
☐ Don‘t look too long at it
☐ Paint.exe
---{Gameplay}---
X Very good
☐ Good
☐ It‘s just gameplay
☐ Mehh
☐ Starring at walls is better
☐ Just don‘t
---{Audio}---
☐ Eargasm
☐ Very good
x Good
☐ Not too bad
☐ Bad
☐ Earrape
---{Audience}---
☐ Kids
☐ Teens
x Adults
☐ Human
☐ Lizards
---{PC Requirements}---
☐ Check if you can run paint
☐ Potato
X Decent
☐ Fast
☐ Rich boiiiiii
☐ Ask NASA if they have a spare computer
---{Difficulity}---
☐ Just press ‚A‘
☐ Easy
X Significant brain usage
☐ Easy to learn / Hard to master
☐ Difficult
☐ Dark Souls
---{Grind}---
☐ Nothing to grind
☐ Only if u care about leaderboards/ranks
☐ Isnt necessary to progress
☐ Average grind level
X Too much grind
☐ You‘ll need a second live for grinding
---{Story}---
☐ Story?
☐ Text or Audio floating around
☐ Average
X Good
☐ Lovely
☐ It‘ll replace your life
---{Game Time}---
☐ Long enough for a cup of coffee
☐ Short
☐ Average
☐ Long
X To infinity and beyond
---{Price}---
☐ It’s free!
☑ Worth the price
☐ If u have some spare money left
☐ Not recommended
☐ You could also just burn your money
---{Bugs}---
☐ Never heard of
X Minor bugs
☐ Can get annoying
☐ ARK: Survival Evolved
☐ The game itself is a big terrarium for bugs
